Neighbor neighbor
Who gots a neighbor
Remember the bible says love yer neighbor
When I gets to heaven
Gonna strip of me duds n
Jump all over them neighbors
Kept my marital vows
N Wuz faithful
Till death do us part
“O” neighbor
Saturday, July 31, 2010
"O" neighbor
Friday, July 30, 2010
The Zazu Pitts syndrome
Years ago in a galaxy far far away
I raced MotoCross for a living
The night before loading up to travel to a race at Diamond Missouri
I had this dream that I was sitting along side the track with thread and needle sewing up a flat rear tire
Went to Diamond
Didn’t blow a tire
Blew 3rd gear
And
The bottom out of the transmission case
Does that qualify?
Thursday, July 29, 2010
Wednesday, July 28, 2010
Greasy Pete
Greasy Pete;
3-4 lbs Spare ribs in a Dutch oven at 325 for 1.5 hrs covered
Then
Cover with 2 quarts Sour Kraut
And
1/2 - 3/4 cups dark brown sugar
Cook 1+1/2 hr longer same temp
No lie this special
Sounds like crap
Ain't
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
What ?
What doesn't...
What keeps me up at night???
Hell
What keeps it up at night
Knowing the liquor stores don’t open till 05:30
Knowing that opium is still illegal
Knowing that few of the people that precipitated the downfall of the current economy won’t serve a single second.
To name a few
Wal-Mart
Chrysler
General motors
AIG
Regan, Bush, Clinton, Bush
Wall street in general
ENRON
Knowing that churches are tax exempt
Woops, I think my store might have just opened
See Ya
Monday, July 26, 2010
Other considerations
The person to decide this hasn't yet and will never be born
Such as
Yeh, but how about people that prey on the elderly
How about someone that hoodwinks you out of everything you ever worked for?
Isn't that taking your life?
How about politicians that start fake wars, take your sons and daughters
How about them
How about people that buy elections
How about them?
How about smooth talkin dudes that get young women pregnant and then scoot
How about them?
How about self centered people that drive like they are the only people on earth and wantonly end lives
How about them?
My Thoughts on the Vengeance Penalty
I assume that what "tamahomejenkins" means is
Humans aren't bright enough to make this call...
Most humans can't even get toilet paper right...
Most humans can't get the implications of the universe right...
So how then are they to decide the death of another human...
I've been accused and gone on trial for deeds which I dint do...
The things that people said in court, couldn't have been more inaccurate....
Got off...
Whew...
I've Sat on two juries...
The discussion in the jury room...
Throw in a stripper and an accordion...
Ya got a real dog n pony show
All of those people needed an new battery of the proper voltage...
Vengeance, Vengeance I tell ya
Sunday, July 25, 2010
Teen Me
Zits
Unused condoms
Anger
Anger
Poorly made home brew
zits
Jail
Getting knocked unconscious repeatedly
Levis
Stolen cars
Pubic hair
Unseen tits
Wishing they weren't unseen
Getting knocked unconscious repeatedly
Begging for Memory
The old saying “The road to hell is paved with good intentions” doesn’t work here.
Maybe the road to Petaluma…
Born in a hotel room in Idaho City
Birth certificate was later issued in Boise
The folks were on he road moving from Minnesota to Idaho and just didn’t quite make it to a city with a hospital.
That would explain my poor manners and overall cantankerous nature.
The old man had a habit of inserting mom into some, any community and the go and find work elsewhere.
This was one of those times.
War years...
My first memory is me sitting in a hole in a dirt front yard in Nampa Idaho.
I was two
Ma had left me off with my godparents for a few months.
The Browns
What's to say they got roped in
Friday, July 23, 2010
What in hell is Numero Uno?
This best friend thing is sort of a touchy subject with me...
But
What isn't...
Over a period of years
My
Best friend always seemed to be someone that had a mirror taste for my sexual habits
Namely a taste for my wife
Haven't had an extramarital friend in 30 years
But
Oh woe is me...
The fly on the wall has a thought balloon
will this guy get it together before his heart stops?
Barring this and barring that
My current wife is my best friend
The plus here is she is welcome to have sex with herself
You asked, dintcha?
Thursday, July 22, 2010
Pastor Sabrowski
Back when my mom was sending me to church...
Back in the olden days...
Pastor Sabrowski would take ya into his office n tell ya about God n Jesus and all them myths...
Oh myth...
Anyway he said I could come to him with any question....
Well I did...
Came in and asked him why God let this happen...
I'll be walking down the hall, and there is this one girl{one class above me}
When I see her I get stiffer than a double shot of Everclear...
And
On a weekly basis you guys do your best to make me feel guilty about that shit...
Splain this punishment to me
Sabrowski: Oh I can't help you with that...
Right then and there I decided that my Sundays were better spent making home brew
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
My Question In Need of an intelligent Answer
To hell with Honest
What is it in the human fear of the unknow that that allows us to
Validate the continued printed, vocalized, broadcast of all religious persuasions
Do we need to be controlled?
Do we need to be told daily, weekly, yearly that we are unable to figure stuff out for ourselves?
After life, are you kidding?
No dogs, no cats?
No flower gardens?
All of you ex Girl friends, boy friends, husbands, wives, bosses, lame lovers...
For a jillion billion years...
Oops that's more than one question
No single malt?
Give it up...
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
Not advice, Just a poem
Kansas
Dust in the wind
Don't hang on
Nothing last forever but the earth and sky
All we are is dust in the wind
Could I Survive No Internet porn for a Whole Month?
Like the say in Texas
Cows ass?
Well he said;
Now that I've gone over to the dark side
And
Do a majority of my bills on-line...
None of my creditors would feel as liberated as I
Modern freedom
Modern problems
And
What would he do for "tabs" and "lyrics"
He'd just have to pick up the acoustic and noodle aimlessly through
TaDah
Mismatched chord progressions
Monday, July 19, 2010
Not a Pet, Just a close friend
My wife is a bit younger than me.
She is still employed at her normal job.
My peeve.
She has no built in concept of punctuality
Late to work by 20 minutes isn't a problem.
99 out of 100 work days.
And yet
Thinks that getting one year older is a valid reason to receive a raise.
Let's hear it from the crowd outside the studio...
as Harvey holds the microphone up to the first person
Should this husband
because he is petty
Be allowed
In the house this evening
Or
Should he rooting on the ground with the ants
And
Racoons
Sunday, July 18, 2010
Challenges We Fight
Fights he thought;
Should he tell about the ones that that ended amiably
Should he tell about the ones that were the last words
Fights, fights, fights
How about the one where his boss whom thought he was a genius
Ended in her saying "I'm so disappointed in you and your lack of humanity"
He decided to tell about the argument with himself as Should I have another beer or should I have another beer and a cigarette
As we fade out we see him at the fridge, hmmm pale ale or Chardonnay???
Real life arguments Fuck em...
Saturday, July 17, 2010
AK Fuzz
Ed n Felix;
Ed: It’s election year, let’s shoot something
Felix:: That’s way too easy, talk to the writer, he’s not usin any imagination
Ed: Let’s shoot the writer
Felix: still way too easy
Ed: Let’s go fishing; the sun hasn’t been down for two weeks and no cop work to do, everything is legal in AK
Felix: Where in the hell did you go to school; these are all half-wit ideas
Ed: No dynamite?
Felix: Got any beer?
Ed: No, I do have some of that Vodka from Palins’ front yard
Felix: C’mon, use your imagination
Ed: Don’t have one I’m a Christian
Felix: Well if that’s the best we can do and we’re out of chickens, sheep, and hookers, let’s head south and start us a reality show
Ed: What’ll we call it?
Felix: I don’t know, but what we won’t call it is Fox News
Friday, July 16, 2010
Thursday, July 15, 2010
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
Another
“I wouldn't recommend sex, drugs, violence or insanity for everyone, but they've always worked for me.”
Hunter S Thompson
One of My Favorite Quotes
First one that comes to mind
Pure knee jerk here...
"
Class isn't something you cab buy kid
Look at you
You're wearing a 1,000 dollar suit
And
You're still low life..."
Jerry Orbach
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
Advice I Failed to head
Most of the time
My great failing
From my uncle Charlie, when I was 9
"Build yourself a foolproof bullshit filter"
90% of what comes out of the human brain is bullshit
It's not good to eat
It's not good to hear
It's not good to believe
It's not good to carry around in your pocket or purse
And
You sure don't want it in bed next to ya
Mom cringed whenever I spent a day or two with uncle Charlie
Monday, July 12, 2010
Sunday, July 11, 2010
My Awk word
Awkward, who said awkward?
Dr. Dees walks into the room
It’s finals day
He holds up 4 papers and shouts, “you four in the back are all flunked!!!”
”You didn’t even bother to change the variable names”
“Jeez, ya think ya could have at least changed the variable names”
“get out of here”
Thorn walked up to Dees and asked…
“What would my grade be if I didn’t write today’s paper?”
Dees replied
“B+”
Thorn replied
“That shouting made me feel like 5, 6, 7 maybe eight beers”
“Jesus, get some people skills over the summer”
“See ya next semester Doc”
Saturday, July 10, 2010
His handdicap
Hey buddy, you want something, or did you just call me down here to piss me off?
Through the haze which was all that was left of his consciousness, Thorn could see the bartender standing in front of him. Thorn had been lost in a dream about the time he was almost murdered with a claw hammer. His unfaithful wife had a new boyfriend. The guy was a member of a biker drug bunch. His wife Betty Sue had been gone for some days leaving Thorn to care for the kids and go to work at the local Chevy agency. Doing after hour detective work he had gotten a line where Betty Sue was staying. After getting a neighbor woman to watch the kids, he had a couple of shots, jumped in the Oldsmobile and driven over to the house to which he’d been directed the night before. Standing at the door he taunted the man at the door, knowing he was on even ground outside. Not getting anywhere with that he went home put the kids to bed and sat up and watched Jack Parr. The next morning Betty Sue returned home. She said what had transpired the night before had scared her. Inside the door on each side were two men with claw hammers waiting for Thorn to pass through the doorway.
Looking up through the haze , Thorn ordered another Glenlivett “Neet”
Friday, July 9, 2010
The Least Confusing Part Is...
Is this actually part of life...
Or
Just part of the bargain?
Most of us, and I mean most of us are sent to school to learn
But
Not to think...
Got finished with my first semester of critical thinking
Went home and asked mom why none of what I'd been taught in church made sense...
She splained that God gave us free will to think as wee pleased...
I said but Mom YadaYadaYddda?????
But
Don't think that!
Thursday, July 8, 2010
Wednesday, July 7, 2010
My Life such as it is
Well Flickr has no clue
So
Fundamentals of assembly programming
cover to cover 9 times
Advanced turbo "C"
cover to cover 10 times
Now doesn't that twist your crank....
6 years retired and still between music lessons and an occasional drunk I read a chapter of one or the other. I really loved machine level programming.
Tuesday, July 6, 2010
Peendleton CPO shirt
My Pendleton woolen mills CPO shirt...
Dint loose it...
Some shit reached in through the cracked window on my pick-up and pinched it
They don't make em like that any more...
Jacket weight pendleton wool shirt...
They make some shirt for people that don't go out doors...
Probably in Malaysia, where it doesn't ever get cold...
Sunday, July 4, 2010
Unlimited Bucks n brains
I’ve rethought this one…
Due to the fact that the voting majority in the US are half-wits
Due to the fact that the voting majority in the US think that our ongoing wars are protecting us from some sort of external foe
Due to the fact that the voting majority in the US think that all moneys spent on law enforcement are correct
I’m not going there
This week-end I traveled on really trashed interstate highways
If I had untold bucks and resources
I’d develop traction devices to replace ”Tire chains” for all forms of motor transport.
Them goddamn tire chains cause untold billions in highway damage yearly…
Taxpayer bucks, taxpayer &%@?”%$#@ bucks…
There is an answer there…
We all pay that toll…
That’s where my unfettered power and resources are going…
Friday, July 2, 2010
The Last Time I Thanked Someone
I take about twenty five loads of yard stuff to the dump, leaves needles, construct/destruction stuff...
My neighbors just burn it...
Like we don't have enough shit in the atmosphere....
(being kind here now)Fuckin cheap, lazy and ignorant as they are...
At the dump they have different levels of tariff for different size loads...
An hour ago:
The guy gave me the lower tariff...
The difference between $10.00 and $15.00
I thanked him...
Thursday, July 1, 2010
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