Plinky

There's a chance

I'm not the only one

No mater

How Ya DOIT

When Ya DOIT

Where Ya DOIT

Why Ya DOIT

What Ya DOIT

How long Ya DOIT



DOOIT

DOOIT

DOOIT

DOOIT



Sounds like an old style oil can, right?

If My Life Was a Movie

My wife doesn't think this movie is funny at all

The life of a well intended bumbler

However mine isn't very funny

Like Naven, I've invented stuff others took and made money on

But

I didn't think of them as inventions

Rather

Things I needed on a daily/weekly basis

Oops, gone off message

Charity begins at home

YA HAD TA ASK DINTCHA

WTF

Ah yes, yes, yes

The not so classic duel between retired Pittsburgh Pirates players

And

The original Teenage Ninja Turtles

For Charity

The Pirates are all drunk

And

The Turtles are over weight and diabetic

The real charity here is that anyone came out to see the game

Plus

They couldn’t even get a real ball field for the game

As

In past years the game has turned into a fistfight

Peppered with kicking and tripping

And

Missed shots with throwing stars

It’s raining

The field has gone muddy

Whose idea was this anyhow?

Looks like the work of Carl Rove

And

“W”

Fast Food

Well, just tother day I was sittin out on the veranda.

Bored stiff, feelin low.

That jug of Arkansas whiskey I’d been nursing was down to bout half a quart.

Thought What next.

Just about then a feeling of meanness came sliding into my soul.

Thought to myself, self, you and I oughta

Slide down to Texas

Open us a manatee fast food stand accrost the street from one of those high school football stadiums.

Come Friday nights game…

People lookin over the shoulder of those in front em

With a sack Manatee Mole Samiches n Crisped armadillo shell will

Just be the envy of the stadium.

Humanity, inhumanity, what is it

DOES IT EXIST

Death by Stoning

I’m not certain that this is a cliché

But

I’m in the studio rehearsing

I’m outside doing pre-winter fix-up

Through all of this I put on 4 DVDs

Making of…

Dark side of the moon

Wish you were here

Animals

The wall



As I walked through the living room, I saw this scene

Men in helmets, shields, flack vests, and wielding clubs rushing in lock step towards some imagined adversary



And

The question entered my head



Are humans capable of being humane…



We have millions of devices

But

Have we left the jungle?

All religions claim love

But

Endorse every form of brutality to everything that exists…

The only Cliché that comes to mind

If it won't go, chrome it.



An old drag racing axiom



However it seems to apply most of modern life



Guys: Get a Justin Bibber hairdo, or get an iPhone or iAnything, or a phast Car, something flashy, something trashy, something ya saw in a movie...

Don't improve yourself, dazzle em with bullshit.

Do a line and grab you junk



Girls: If ya can't perform get a tit job or something flashy, something trashy, something ya saw on TV

Do a line and follow with a couple of well placed pelvic thrusts

Marking time(Safe) Versus Living(Sorry?)

That moment hasn't come yet

If it were a part of my psyche or overall makeup

I wouldn't have

Spent 5 1/2 years of my 69 in plaster

Nor

Awakened 3 times to discover that it was a week or so later

always a trip

There is definitely something missing from my upbringing

But this answer is very good



http://www.plinky.com/answers/109502

Aint No Weird Foods

What's with the photo with every prompt?

Is that for people that can't read or write?

There are no weird foods

Only

People with weird food attitudes



Anything you can digest

Is

In keeping with our ancestors



Da monkeys

Songs that sooth my being

Three of maybe a hundred that I play sparingly

To be certain that I don't ever tire of them

Wish you were here by Pink Floyd

Million Miles Away by Rory Gallagher

Comfortably numb by Pink Floyd

Mr. Dirt

Ron Hughes [Mr Dirt]

My cousin

My mentor

My hero

5’ 7”

Tall enough to be distinguished from dwarves

Short enough to be looked down on

Ron wasn’t that physically dirty, but he just grew up treating people like dirt

Tellin old ladies it was ok to cross in the middle of the block,”I’ve got you back”

Takin money out of the plate in church by putting gum on his little finger

    And distracting attention with, “Look, bats in the ceiling”

Ron did have his good side, he’d share his ill gotten gains with me.

Some times he’d fill a can with the weed killer round up

   Take a water color brush and walk around painting leaves on rose bushes as he passed, sometimes squirting lighter fluid on em, lighting em and watch people try to put it out

Ol ron he’d take wheel chair bound folks for walks, set one brake and set em spinning

Tie the tails of two cats together and sling em over a clothes line

Almost never bathed, but was a snappy dresser

Did need some dental work

And

A hair cut

But don’t we all



Ol Ron he's a hoot

Sci-fi Guy

Image, whatta ya mean image

We

Don't gotta show you no stinkin image

Sci-Fi Guy:

Con Stan

From the Galaxy Tinople



Heard that there was water on earth

Now, ol Con been lookin for that water for 4.5 billion years

Bein as how it had been pilfered from planet #45

The theft goes back 4.459 billion years

Con, he’s been busy

Not that busy though

He’s been collecting concubines, here n there

Count em [45,000]

Now there’s a stable to support

Hasn’t been all sex, drugs, n rock and roll

He also has to prepare the {water found} report to the big guy

The big guy, namely “W

Well Con has to report the sad news that the water now contains raw oil and bits of plastic

Unbeknownst to him, W has a taste for raw oil, and can tolerate plastic shards..

……………………….



Pictures at 11

Brains or Beauty?

Sex or Suzuki

Yeh, but

What is beauty?

What is intelligence?

Every decade redefines both

Some people think of Einstein as being super intelligent

However

They don’t know what he is lauded for nor have any understanding of his accomplishments

Some people read poetry and assign inner beauty to the poet

Is He/She?

Physical beauty and true intelligence don’t necessarily have to be mutually exclusive

We assign “brainy”, to the some of the biggest fools

We assign “beauty” to some of the worst personalities





Never been good lookin

Never been overly intelligent

Never been able to change either

You is or you isn’t



Don’t you have some yard work to do?

A Book I'd Be

Might as well be the dictionary

I have a personality flaw...

Thus......

By the time I've finished a book

I've brought forth a dislike for every one in it

Go figure...

Sociopath?

On second thought…

Seems I've already done it

Mr slow thinker

This is by no means a whine

My life has been a road trip

By the time I was 15, I’d lived in 11 or 12 houses/hotels/apartment/other

6 years in the navy destroyers/sea going tugs/destroyer tender/hospital ship

The ensuing years, had 51 jobs, fired 45 times{never knew when to shut my mouth}

2 years on the road rodeoin{not good at it, but what else did I know that was good for bucks}

8 years on the road racing in 36 of the 50, Cancun Mexico, Thunder Bay Ontario



The rest of the time {mechanicing/welder fitter/farm labor/Software engineer} Spent where they paid the most.

Wives don’t like them sort of shenanigans, tend to find another life, another partner

Just for fun and mental health, put 145k on a 1975 750 Honda

Never thought of it before

But

My life has been a road trip

Our Epic Road Trip

I'm with

John Bulmer

http://www.plinky.com/answers/108520

But I'm riding in the back

And

In charge of libation and procuring

We will be coming home, won't we John?

Heart Versus Head

I'm just sitting here between practice sessions

And

It came to me

I'm a guy

Which head?????????

Depends

, and he's not talkin diapers

It's locational



I had an uncle Charlie

By the time I was 9, he'd given me enough guides to life to fill a book

When I've taken time to be logical, they worked



However:



He dint tell me nuffin bouts love

Probably knew what a mine field that can be

n

Took me fishin instead

Me Been a fool fer love alla me life

Oh Boohoo

No matter how ya make decisions, ya end up dead

Them adventures where the roller-coaster jumps the track are the best

There is nothing like a plaster cast or attempted suicide to clear the sinuses



Stay tuned

Pictures at 11

People Renamed me daily

As a chubby little kid I took a lot of abuse for my first and last

But hey

What's new with cruelty from children

As an adult I've been renamed several times by people that at various times Liked, loathed, loved and or just plain wanted me dead.



some

Hey fuck head

Get out of here asshole

Honey could we go to the shore this summer

What's new beat-off

Are you really Thai-stick Thom

Hey motorman, what's shakin

Dad

[The kid's favorite] Mr. fuckin know it all

[My wife's favorite] Mr. Dirt



child-mind

air-head

lost-boy

The Legs-Crossed Lovers

Oh Fernando

Oh Fernando

[pause]

Don't touch me there

Fernando looks over his shoulder at his waiting black steed

Ok, I won't

Maybe I'll take the Ferrari this time

See ya

Hysterically Speaking

Once upon a time;

And

This is all true

However the clothing has been changed to give the reader the notion of great personal hygiene

There was a big continent which we call Pangea

Unfortunately that continent split in half

Time went by and the plants came

Time went by and people that eventually had dark skin came

A lot more time went by and Vikings came [without Bret Favre]

A lot more time went by

And

Germans, English, French, Italians, Spanish, Dutch, Polish, Latvians

And

Norsemen came

They turned out to be greedy, dirty, ill mannered, and disease ridden

Didn’t turn out so good for the dark skinned folk

That was that

If you want any more, you’ll have to sing it yourself

Chinese Saint Patricks Day Feast

Bok Choy
Cut the entire plant, stalks and leaves into bite size pieces

Rinse and chill for 3 hours

1 corned beef
simmer in water enough to cover with the packet in a tea ball, three hours.

remove from water and let come to room temp

Dynasty Chinese Duck sauce
Open the bottle

pour into a bowl

refill the bottle with corned beef liquid

cover, shake and add to duck sauce in bowl

Girard's Chinese chicken salad dressing
Shake and open bottle

Chow mein noodles
Dice the corned beef into bite size pieces

Heat wok with vegetable oil over high heat

Add corned beef

Just heat it

Pour duck sauce over it and bring all to a boil, reduce flame to half

Reduce mix for 3-4 minutes

Heap each plate with chilled bok choy

Ladle sauce and corned beef over it

Drizzle salad dressing liberally over it

Top with chow mein noodles

Serve

A Book Every Parent Should Read With their Child

Disobedience is the true foundation of liberty.

The obedient must be slaves.

Any or all Thoreau



Because Thoreau was a man with few if any illusions

We tend raise our children with way too many illusions and nonsense

Déjà Vu and Yogi Berra

A match made in heaven

Yogi Berra and Whitey Ford, Spring Training, Tampa Bay, FL 2001

Yes, it happened again

A prompt to which I have little

Or

No connection

My Country, It's Like yours

Reply from a Mandan person

My creator put me here

But

I’ve never been anywhere

Even the most poorly lit bar that wasn’t beautiful in it’s own way

My country is like yours

Trees n rocks n wind n rain or lack thereof

The people here are like yours

We all eat, drink, piss, shit, procreate, sleep and die

We are all mostly mistaken about 98% of everything

Some of us are better mannered than others

Most of us aren’t stupid, just too lazy to think for ourselves

Just like your place, some of us have a major screw loose

The earth neither loves some of us, as in your place of birth

Some of us don’t love, understand, nor care about the earth, as in your place of birth

Alas

Some of the participants are human animals just as you and I

Monkeys with or without drivers licenses

This Morning So Far away

Dahlia in my garden

Thorn's wife walked up behind him and said

{

You haven't done any of the stuff you were supposed to yet

What are you doing?

Plinky, what in the heck is plinky?

A blog, I thought you didn't do blogs...

Are you trying to meet women?

I swear Thorn, your brain is turning to mush...

Turn that computer of and get outside

Winter is coming and you have 25 things to do...

Start with the green house, then the dahlias

}

Thorn slumped

pulled the bottle of scotch[single malt] from under the desk

Took a shot

And

Turned the computer off

TaTa plinky

Seems someone was trying to hustle me

This might qualify

Do you take Jesus Christ as your personal lord and savior?

A So-so Line

I never had one

But

I raced for 20 years

And

Had some sorta bike

Motocross near Tankersley

Could you take me for a ride?



All four wives

Worked on me

A nice place

The Barstow CA Dump

It's high, high above the valley

I know it's the dump

Pfftt

But

The view is incredible

And

It was at a time in my life

When

I was more in love than ever before or ever since



Everything in life and on earth was great

Everything in life and on earth was grand

Everything in life and on earth was beautiful



Sheesh